A life that begins with so much promise only to turn bad, but is there redemption for Sinbad?
Necessary Roughness - Andre Krimm
First Kid - Sam Simms
Good Burger - Mr. Wheat
Now it was time for Andre Krimm to utilize the teaching degree he had obtained while at Texas State University. Upon exiting the Secret Service, and as a result of his much-publicized heroics, Andre was asked to adopt a new last name as a means of avoiding retribution for foiling the assassination attempt of the President's son. Thereafter, he'd be known as Andre Wheat, Mr. Wheat to his students.
At the end of his first year teaching, Mr. Wheat's car, a black 1993 Infiniti J30 (original MSRP $33,000), is significantly damaged by Dexter Reed [4]. Mr. Wheat gives Dexter the summer to pay him for the repairs to his car. However, shortly after the repairs to his car are made, Mr. Wheat's car is again damaged, this time irreparably, by a gigantic falling burger statue.
Without the means to replace his automobile and already on thin ice for extorting a student ($2,500 for the repairs to his Infiniti?), Mr. Wheat is let go from his position and is unable to find another teaching position. In need of money, Mr. Wheat takes the only position he can find at the time.
Jingle All the Way - Myron Larabee
The United States Postal Service is always looking for new hires. A difficult job at the best of times and an impossible job at the worst...the holidays. Andre, a prior employee of the federal government and desperate for some for of subsistence, legally changes his name to Myron Larabee. The USPS, in need of hands for the upcoming holiday season, only takes a cursory glance at his background checks; this is a marriage of necessity.
During his employment as a postal worker, Myron develops a deep fandom for Turbo-Man universe (TMU, not to be confused with our MCU). The newly released Turbo-Man action figure becomes the toy of the holiday season and Myron will stop at nothing to get his hands on one (including the creation of a fictional son as a means of currying sympathy from unsuspecting people).
Myron's feud with Howard Langston results in Myron donning the Dementor costume and threatening the life of Langston's child (this got dark quick!). Ultimately, Myron is arrested (he does get his Turbo-Man action figure...thanks Anakin Skywalker!) and sentenced to a year in prison.
Houseguest - Kevin Franklin
After his release from prison, Myron continues struggling to make ends meet. Having ruined his credit, Myron adopts the more generic Kevin Franklin in order to obtain a loan from the lender of last resort...the mob.
Kevin's $5,000 loan quickly grows to $50,000 with the addition of interest (gotta read the fine print Kevin!) and, unable to pay, Kevin flees. While evading capture, Kevin befriends the Young family and spends time in Sewickley, Pennsylvania.
Eventually, the mob finds his location, but a deal is worked out: Kevin trades a winning lottery ticket for his life. Fast forward several months, and Kevin has become a best-selling author utilizing his experience with the Youngs. He continues to live his life with the Young family, having finally regained happiness that had been lost so long ago.
Best Quote Nominations
"Oh, I'm doing fine; except for the fact somebody hit me with a chair." Spoken by Andre Krimm, the toughest guy on the Texas State Armadillos; even a chair being broken over him isn't a big deal.
"We suck, ya hear that Luke? We suck, alright, we suck! Let's make a sucky left turn here." Spoken by Sam Simms; tough but honest.
"Get out of my way box!" Spoken by Myron Larabee during his pursuit of the Turbo-Man action figure, he displays the quick footedness and aggression that made him so successful at football.
Stray Notes & Observations
[1] Ranked by IMDB as the 24th best defensive American football character. Paul Blake (QB and likely a linebacker?) is ranked 14th, ahead of Krimm, in what many believe to be a travesty. See List Here
[2] The same Charlie Banks from Minnesota and coached by one Jack Reilly (Lane Smith)!?
[3] Played by Timothy Busfield who may become the focus of a future Thread if only to let me talk about Little Big League.
[4] Dexter Reed Thread
Necessary Roughness - Andre Krimm
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| Go 'Dillos |
The criminally underrated tale of the Texas State Armadillos wouldn't be complete without the contributions of wiz-kid Andre Krimm (Buy Jersey Here!). The 6'4", 235 lb. (est.) defensive linemen [1] becomes a major contributor on both sides of the ball, since the 'Dillos are forced to play iron-man football by the evil Dean. Andre, along with Paul Blake, Featherstone, and Charlie Banks [2] was a key piece to the Armadillo's Cinderella season when they finished 1-9-1.
Following his final year of eligibility, Andre graduated and decided, rather than devote his life to science, to give back to his country.
First Kid - Sam Simms
Joining the Secret Service just before the inauguration of President Paul Davenport, Andre adopts a pseudonym by order of the Treasury Department in an attempt to avoid unwanted attention for the former college football player.
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| What is up with that tie? |
Now known as Sam Simms, he completes his training and hopes to join the presidential protection detail. Sam is given the assignment of protecting the President's 13 year old son, Luke, instead, following the termination of Luke's primary agent [3]. While not the assignment Sam had hoped for, he tries to make the best of it, eventually becoming Luke's friend and interceding in an attempted assassination during which he is shot in the shoulder.
After an unfortunate incident involving a street hockey game, Luke's mouth, and a street hockey puck, Sam is relieved of his duty and given an honorable discharge from the Secret Service. Having served his country, albeit shortly, Sam is forced to return to education.
Good Burger - Mr. Wheat
Now it was time for Andre Krimm to utilize the teaching degree he had obtained while at Texas State University. Upon exiting the Secret Service, and as a result of his much-publicized heroics, Andre was asked to adopt a new last name as a means of avoiding retribution for foiling the assassination attempt of the President's son. Thereafter, he'd be known as Andre Wheat, Mr. Wheat to his students.
At the end of his first year teaching, Mr. Wheat's car, a black 1993 Infiniti J30 (original MSRP $33,000), is significantly damaged by Dexter Reed [4]. Mr. Wheat gives Dexter the summer to pay him for the repairs to his car. However, shortly after the repairs to his car are made, Mr. Wheat's car is again damaged, this time irreparably, by a gigantic falling burger statue.
 |
| Kelly Blue Book is about $1,200 today; might need some work |
Without the means to replace his automobile and already on thin ice for extorting a student ($2,500 for the repairs to his Infiniti?), Mr. Wheat is let go from his position and is unable to find another teaching position. In need of money, Mr. Wheat takes the only position he can find at the time.
Jingle All the Way - Myron Larabee
The United States Postal Service is always looking for new hires. A difficult job at the best of times and an impossible job at the worst...the holidays. Andre, a prior employee of the federal government and desperate for some for of subsistence, legally changes his name to Myron Larabee. The USPS, in need of hands for the upcoming holiday season, only takes a cursory glance at his background checks; this is a marriage of necessity.
During his employment as a postal worker, Myron develops a deep fandom for Turbo-Man universe (TMU, not to be confused with our MCU). The newly released Turbo-Man action figure becomes the toy of the holiday season and Myron will stop at nothing to get his hands on one (including the creation of a fictional son as a means of currying sympathy from unsuspecting people).
 |
| Who wouldn't want one? |
Myron's feud with Howard Langston results in Myron donning the Dementor costume and threatening the life of Langston's child (this got dark quick!). Ultimately, Myron is arrested (he does get his Turbo-Man action figure...thanks Anakin Skywalker!) and sentenced to a year in prison.
Houseguest - Kevin Franklin
After his release from prison, Myron continues struggling to make ends meet. Having ruined his credit, Myron adopts the more generic Kevin Franklin in order to obtain a loan from the lender of last resort...the mob.
Kevin's $5,000 loan quickly grows to $50,000 with the addition of interest (gotta read the fine print Kevin!) and, unable to pay, Kevin flees. While evading capture, Kevin befriends the Young family and spends time in Sewickley, Pennsylvania.
Eventually, the mob finds his location, but a deal is worked out: Kevin trades a winning lottery ticket for his life. Fast forward several months, and Kevin has become a best-selling author utilizing his experience with the Youngs. He continues to live his life with the Young family, having finally regained happiness that had been lost so long ago.
Best Quote Nominations
"Oh, I'm doing fine; except for the fact somebody hit me with a chair." Spoken by Andre Krimm, the toughest guy on the Texas State Armadillos; even a chair being broken over him isn't a big deal.
"We suck, ya hear that Luke? We suck, alright, we suck! Let's make a sucky left turn here." Spoken by Sam Simms; tough but honest.
"Get out of my way box!" Spoken by Myron Larabee during his pursuit of the Turbo-Man action figure, he displays the quick footedness and aggression that made him so successful at football.
Stray Notes & Observations
[1] Ranked by IMDB as the 24th best defensive American football character. Paul Blake (QB and likely a linebacker?) is ranked 14th, ahead of Krimm, in what many believe to be a travesty. See List Here
[2] The same Charlie Banks from Minnesota and coached by one Jack Reilly (Lane Smith)!?
[3] Played by Timothy Busfield who may become the focus of a future Thread if only to let me talk about Little Big League.
[4] Dexter Reed Thread
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